This interview is addressed to international students in a campus fellowship like Inter Varsity or those thinking of starting and leading an "International Student Fellowship" on a campus in North America. It has also admonishes those wondering whether to eventually return home.

The interviewee, Ng, is a former Malaysian student in the United States who returned recently to Malaysia. This interview took place in the summer 2002 just after she started her new job at a private college in Malaysia.

1) How did you develop as a leader while a student at the University of Nebraska?

Jac Thiessen was the IV staff worker at the time when I first arrived at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln during the Winter/Spring 1996 semester. Before I left Malaysia, I had already been involved in IFES related campus ministry in Malaysia, and it was my heart's desire to continue being involved in the U.S.

Friends who had gone to the U.S. before me suggested I look up InterVarsity Christian Fellowship at my campus. And that's just what I did, though it took awhile to find the fellowship because they were on winter break! But finally, the semester started, and I met Jac and a few IV students at a booth they had set up in the student union. That's where it all started.

Jac became my first REAL American friend and he invested time in me. He brought me to my prayer and chapter meetings, and later to my first Bible Study training. He helped me build friendships with others in the chapter, especially the leaders. Along the way, the students themselves took the initiative to meet up with me, and I with them.

I got involved slowly at first, feeling my way around, learning to understand Americans. I was also still adapting to life in the U.S. I joined the worship team, and began to attend Fall Conference, Chapter Camp and so on. I got involved in NSO, in friendship evangelism, and somewhere along the way, Jac and the other leaders challenged me to get involved in leadership.

I struggled at first, but eventually, felt God's assurance and decided to go for it. I became Prayer Coordinator for our UNL IV chapter. It was an exciting time of fun, growth, learning and seeing breakthroughs in prayer. It was truly a challenge learning to model prayer for the chapter as well as inspire, disciple and lead the chapter in the whole area of prayer.

I learnt how Americans prayed and worshiped, and Americans learnt how Asian believers prayed and worshiped. Another staff worker, Gina Ahn, also challenged me and our chapter in the whole area of prayer. Gina also gave me a renewed love for small group ministry after being in her small group, and in my final year, I was asked to help out at Small Group Leader's training at Chapter Camp 1998. I think it was there that I felt I wanted to try out as a staff worker when I got home to Malaysia. I also learnt leadership by watching Suzanne Vogel and Mark Ehresman.

One of the main highlights during my time growing and learning as a leader at UNL was watching ministry and outreach towards international students finally take off. Previously, the work had been sporadic. But in my final two years there, different student ministries and churches, staff workers and campus ministers were finally catching the vision of touching the nations on our doorstep.

These leaders were beginning to come together. Staff workers and campus ministers began to meet and pray together each week. And to top it all off, a dear friend I had been praying for and investing time in heard God's call upon her life, went to Urbana 96, came back to UNL fired up, and with the help of InterVarsity, establised a ministry specifically towards international students. This ministry became a catalyst that started other work towards internationals.

This is how I caught my own vision for international student work and how much I wanted to bring it back to Malaysia in some way because Malaysia was also attracting a lot of international students on its campuses. Watching different ministries and student ministry staff workers and campus ministers also helped strengthen my belief in the need for the WHOLE Body of Christ in reaching our world with the gospel. It was a glimpse of that real unity we share in Christ, and I long to see that happen here in my country.

So, how did I develop as a leader at UNL? It was a journey. I was reluctant. I struggled. I was kept accountable. I learnt that we can run around, look busy, appear spiritual, say a whole bunch of things, DO stuff, and DO programs, but at the end of the day, we REPRODUCE WHO WE TRULY ARE. I learnt that leadership was about influence, relationships, life touching life and reproducing life.

Key people who made the commitment to invest in me and disciple me made all the difference. My IV staff workers were so crucial in the process. I was also blessed by the associate dean of the school of business who is a deeply committed Christian and who just allowed us to walk into his office to talk, share, pray ... yes, I read books, attended camps and conferences, but books, camps and conferences don't mean anything until and unless you have these people in your life who become God's gifts to you in shaping you towards whatever end God has in mind.

Being involved in student leadership gave me the chance to throw myself in the whole life of the chapter and my campus, and I can honestly say that I had a FULL student life as an undergrad at UNL. It was fun. It was powerful. I cried. I laughed. I fought. God stretched and grew me in so many areas. I fell. I got up again, by His grace. I learnt how to integrate my faith with studies, work and ministry and relationships with real people in a real world. The journey continues and God be praised!

2) How were these skills (or what you learned) applied when you returned home?

Well, I had picked up many skills in areas such as music, worship, evangelism, working with internationals, Bible study, small group ministry, and discipling and training others, so I gradually got involved in youth ministry at my home church, and am working towards establishing a culture of student initiative and student leadership in my youth.

I'm also involved as a helper with FES Malaysia in working to establish the work of international student ministry here in my country. In my church again, I am involved in a cell group and am trying to encourage my cell group towards a more interactive, stimulating way of doing Bible Study. I spent one year (from July 2001 till June 2002) as a staff worker with FES and during this time, I grew even more and picked up even more skills and experiences in leadership.

Towards the end of my one year with FES, I felt called return to the marketplace to re-explore what God has in store for me, as well as be a witness and a voice in the marketplace. I enjoy evangelism, though I struggle with fear and shyness, but I love it. Learning how to integrate my faith with work, relationships, etc. has been helping me be more and more of a real person in the marketplace. It is challenging. It can get confusing and painful and frustrating, but I believe it is where God wants me to be.

My burden to pray and seek out lost people and invite them to investigative studies has been renewed and now I'm seeking direction from the Lord on how to proceed further. Christians in Malaysia have become inward-looking, withdrawn from the real world, legalistic, "weird", selfish, comfortable and racist. Christians in Malaysia are consumed with fear, compromise and materialism. Lost people don't find us attractive anymore.

I hate this situation so deeply I want to vomit every time I think of it. I fight myself every day from falling into the same things. It gets depressing. But InterVarsity planted a deep call to evangelism and missions in my heart and I carry it to this day. Sometimes it feels like it will be extinguised, but God and key people in my life keep it burning.

3) What encouragements do you have for international students who are currently growing as Christ's disciples and potential leaders?

One sentence: Don't you dare return to your home countries the same person.

My encouragements are to learn all you possibly can. There are so many opportunities in the United States that God has provided for us to take hold of. This is one of the great gifts of the U.S. to the world. And it is God who has made it so. Don't waste your time and chances over in the U.S. to learn. Get involved in ministry. Get involved in leadership and the fellowship. Attend conferences, camps and seminars.

Learn to build relationships with people who are so different from you. Learn from Americans and let them learn from you. You have something special to give to them and they have something special to give to you. Open your heart to learning, to giving and receiving. Develop a life of prayer, worship, and Bible Study. I learnt all those skills as a student.

If we want to grow and remain growing, there are things we need to do, habits we need to establish in our needs. God's grace is at work in us but we need to place ourselves in a place where His grace can work freely. Don't withdraw yourself from people on campus, or stick to your own group. Fight yourself. I had to, with God's help.

Many times I felt like giving up on myself, on Americans, on the InterVarsity chapter, and just keep to myself and finish my studies, lead my own life. But fight it. I had to make myself learn how to listen to Americans and to engage in dialogue and conflict with them.

What I am saying is, don't get stuck in your own little world on campus. That's too easy to do. Face the difficulties, immerse yourself in relationships, have tons of fun and experiences, and be different. Don't return to your home countries the same person. Don't you dare return the same person! You are in the U.S. for a reason!

God wants to shape us into agents of reconciliation and redeeming grace so that we can return to our home countries and be influencers in every area and at every level. If you are called by God to remain in the U.S., then so be it. But don't close the door to the idea of returning home. Yes, it will be difficult, different, and sometimes, even dangerous. But God will be with us! ALL THE WAY! He is faithful!

All this is to invest our lives for eternity! Do something with your life that will last forever. There are days when I long to return to the U.S. and there are days when I regret coming home. But God keeps re-assuring me that He has brought me home for a reason. There is a place for you back home and God is preparing it even now while you are in the U.S. Trust Him to provide. He will give His children good things.

One piece of practical advice: figure out how to set up accountability relationships when you return. While I was a student, I met up with a friend each week to see how we were doing spiritually as well as other issues in our lives. This helped me so much that when I came home to Malaysia I wanted to continue the same thing. Learn to do this now and when you return home, try to find a way to continue in it. Your staff worker can teach you how to set something like this up.