The Truth About Big, Scary Life Choices 

“What are you doing after you graduate?”  

Your palms are sweaty as you avoid direct eye contact and manage a smile. 

Oh, you know, just about to start working with my dream company that I’ll be with for the next 25 years. I also just got engaged, so I’ll be starting a family soon. Actually no, I’m moving overseas to become a full-time missionary in France!

All the stellar Christian-out-of-college answers rumble through your head. Instead, “I’m still figuring out what’s next” comes out of your mouth.  

Sound familiar? If so, have no fear. You, dear college student, don’t need to know what you’re doing for the rest of your life. In fact, I’ll let you in on a little secret: No one knows what they’re doing for the rest of their life. 

Everyone faces decisions about the future at some point, and the way forward is taking small, informed steps at a time and looking back in gratitude. When I get bogged down with worry about the future, I find it helpful to look at things from a bigger perspective.  

Hope of Jesus in Every Transition

If you told me twelve months ago that a year out from graduation, I would be working a fulfilling full-time job in a city that I love and fostering long-term community, I would have thought that was too good to be true. Yet, I would have trusted deep down that what you said would happen, because I have witnessed the Lord’s hand in my life. 

I have witnessed a brother’s rapidly declining mental health move our family to a completely new city and community where I found long-lasting friendships. I have had best friends move across the world and found my appreciation for cross-cultural experiences deepen. I have seen a global pandemic take away loved ones, only to watch my family grow closer together through it. I can testify to a God who takes my broken situations and replenishes me every time I need it. 

We’ve all experienced pain and transition on some level, but we’ve all experienced comfort and restoration, too. This is what it means to be human. And as Christians, we have the hope of Jesus to guide us through.  

Choosing the “Right” Path 

I read a book in college entitled "To Be Told" by Dan Allender. This book taught me how to look at my life as a story that God is writing. It helped me learn to ask the question, “What would make sense for me to do next, knowing the story God has written thus far?” It also taught me that who I am becoming is who I will become. This has re-framed the way I think about God’s will. 

God doesn’t tell us to sit around waiting for him to write in flaming letters in the sky his will for us. Instead, he asks us to take steps in faith. As you take the next foreseeable step – and it might feel like there aren’t any now, which is okay – explore the opportunities you have. I invite you to let go of the idea of one “right” path and try a prayer like this: “Lord, I am saying yes to this next step – this next good thing. If there is something better for me, please redirect me toward that.”   

Ultimately, entrusting your way to the Lord is more important than choosing the right path, since it is the Lord who will make your path straight (Prov. 3:5-6). 

Take the Pressure Off 

Take some deep breaths. Think about what God has brought you through. What are you grateful for? Is the pressure off yet? If not, take some time to reflect and be honest with yourself. Try asking: 

• Where have I been? Who am I becoming? Entrust those answers to the Lord.

• What would make sense for me to do with the networks and resources I have?

• Where have I seen God’s hand at work in my life?

• Am I making decisions every day to work towards a sustainable, others-loving, God-abiding life for myself right now? 

It might seem backwards, but practicing gratitude is key when it comes to thinking about the future. Being grateful for where you have been and where you are now helps you cultivate hope for the future. In Matthew 6, Jesus says, “Do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothes?“ 

Jesus calls us away from worrying about our future and toward seeking his kingdom first. If the birds of the air and the flowers of the field are to be our role models, then how much more valuable must we be! 

So, dear college student, you don’t need to have your life figured out. Take the pressure off yourself and open your eyes to what the next step is. Take time to swim through scripture. Let it inhabit you. You are the Lord’s temple (1 Cor. 3:16). And be thankful! (Col. 3:15-16). Pray that the words of your mouth and the meditation of your heart be pleasing to your Rock and your Redeemer (Ps. 19:14). Read through the Sermon on the Mount. Pray the Lord’s prayer. Talk to mentor figures and meaningful people in your life if you feel like you need further discernment about next steps. 

Ultimately, no one has life figured out. So, when you feel like you are facing big, scary life choices, look up and cheer up! You’re not alone.  

For more resources on discernment or life after college, check out our IVP books on this topic!